A day out

Due to the lack of participants and tiredness, we have decided to give up on going to East Coast Park for fellowship.. But after thinking thru and discussing, the few of us decided to go there.. Thank God that i was there.. Just a group of us, Raymond, Jie Lin, Leonard, Charlotte and Me.. Having fun playing bridge, joking and blowing air-con at one another.. Definitely wouldn't forget today for its the first time I rollerbladed!! Fall down like N times but it is still enjoyable.. Now the cute and sweet bois can rollerblade already, just that one fall the other might just fall, its pretty contagious.. Must thank our mentors for the good teachings.. haa

After all these fun we had.. We went down to New York New York for dinner, surprised to see a smurf and fatts there too.. There we continue to bridge and have a wonderful dinner together, sharing is so much fun..

I believe I can come out of the valley. There are people who care and are willing to help.. Feel so much better after sharing my thoughts and toils with Raymond, making me realize that not only I feel the same.. So I strongly encourage myself and people who are the same to take a step of faith courageously, trusting and believing in Him.

The Banquet

First time that I initiated to watch a 'wu xia' movie.. Don't really like to watch such shows, cause they are boring and draggy. But this is different.. I got attracted to the show because of Zhou Xun and Ziyi Zhang.. They are such powerful and good actresses after Gong Li [ I like her role as Hatsumomo]. Later i realise that this show portraits the harsh reality of life, backstabbing and hypocrites do exist. Sometimes we don't know which side to stand on to protect ourselves and our love ones..

Kinda pity 'Qing Nu'.. dying for her unconditional love for 'Prince Wu Luan' although she kinda caused her own death.. Till the end of the show, I still cant tell whether the empress wan er is a good character or a villain.. even when she died.. She was so power hungry that she could kill anyone in her way.. Sometimes love is really powerful..

Take it ALL

The LORD is my shepherd;
I do not want.

Yea, though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

Life's like this.. Ya.. Off i go into the valley again.. Cant help it.. Depressed.. See what a long break can do to me.. Make me ponder and think about too many things. Life's a struggle with Life itself.. When will i step out of this valley? i dunno..

Playing on the slide

Seems like it, the journey is ending; i suppose so. It doesn't seem to be as simple as it is before, not as heartwarming as before and definitely not as ideal as before. It is obviously more demanding, more unpleasant and more pressurizing. Do i have a vision? Until now I don't.

Redeeming the time, for the days are evil.
So I need to learn to number my days and not waste them.

Life isn't that good all the time yar?

Giving In

Its time to brace up and face it.. I'm nearing 20 and ORD and i don't have much achievements.. Am i good enough? Am i Faithful? Am i a good friend/ listener? I cant judge myself but what i can do is to try and be a better person then..

Anger, Hurt, Fear, Regret, Intention, Love.. I give in..

Sick

Guessed i must have scared a lot of people.. I felt so weak.. cant walk properly, breathlessness fills me.. and coldness kills me.. I had food poisoning, although i wished it was because of the cookhouse' breakfast.. it isn't.. Its not expired cornflakes either.. Its some oyster omelette i ate that might be too oily and raw ya.. Anyway, i felt so much better today.. Imagine yesterday i was still wearing jeans, a polo tee and a jacket and with blanket and socks, sleeping without air con or a fan.. and still i felt cold.. vomitted so badly at night.. yucks.. no more hor fun for me.. i suppose i will go bland this few days.. Milo is now my best fren.. lol..

But i want to thank god ya, for not forsaking me ya.. not that He 'blessed' me with this sickness, but actually showed me how much i'm cared for.. my family showered me with care and concern which i deeply appreciated.. I could ask for food from mum anytime when i'm hungry.. my sis give in to me.. Dad came to camp and drove me home.. Friends would ask whether if i'm alright.. willing to pray for me.. Really grateful, i can recover so fast by the grace of God ya.. He's my Jehovah Rapha..

Food Galore!

Since its the post-outfield time, one can definitely spot traces of 40SAR soldiers on Orchard road's restaurants, big or small, buffet or ala carte.. eating their hearts out.. I'm one of them too, and i'm glad that i have the company of a group of fun guys while having a ma fan tasty meal @ NEWYORK² on Sat.. and then having desserts at NYDC to round up, bringing the food trip to an end.. I guessed we had the most fun with the massaging chairs, where our legs are tickled and squeezed awkwardly.. however, it still feels good.. haha

This is not the end.. after sun service i went to food fest with Annie, Jac and Zihao, looking for exotic and delicious snacks.. First up, me and Zihao helped ourselves to a Black Sesame ice- cream and Green tea ice cream.. Then, we all had egg tarts, after that is bbq char chiew Pao then satays larger and juicier than the usual ones, then 2 sistas had laksa together while zihao gets a shark fin soup, something worth mentioning is the durian puffs, the taste is so explosive, that even now i still burp durian! Wow! So fulfilling.. and meal is ended with hmm.. a packet of fried mushroom crisps wasabi flavoured!! So cool lor.. i like wasabi!

No matter how life is.. we still need to eat and live, so y not enjoy them while we could?

Anger Management

God, i say to you now, that i give you my anger, that i shall be angry when i should, but in a totally controlled manner. I will not sin against you but to find the best way to resolve the problem. For i love you like you love me.. Agape

Ord-ing

Thank God, it's all over.. the many many dirty outfields have finally finished.. Was wondering how i managed to clear it.. it seems so far then.. but now its all over.. no more field camps.. no more signal sets (at least for now) and no more gigiantic map boards! Oh no, i forgot to step on the Tes' set which is extremely bulky and heavy, even heavier than my signal set.. Yea.. finally i can see the light at the end of the tunnel.. closing to be Operational ready NSmen.. time to get a life haha..

It's time to reflect and plan what's ahead, especially offs and leaves ya.. been slogging so much that i think i need a decent break, to clean up my horrible room and virus-juicy computer.. and also find joy in what i'm doing.. been into too much stress and pressure that i feel depressed at times.. haha.. however, i guess its alright already.. haa.. going for morning jog + breakfast.. Ciao..

Why bother?

Everyone's linked up.. by relationship, blood or bond.. and it takes lots of time to make them work.. i definitely know that.. Pray that i could step out of the asocial and avoidant personality and work towards a better relationship.. Ministry people all nice people.. thanks Issac, Joseph, Elaine, Caroline and Wai Sum.. =]

Farmer.. wake up please?

i'm tired

This couldn't be more obvious.. I'm tired.. running out of breath.. blogging in the middle of the night.. haha.. turning a bit cranky and screw loosed nowadays.. at least not being loose and leading a promiscous life.. Time that i wished i have more time..

I read the book 'King Me' which is a parenting book which i accidentally [ i believe incidentally by God.. He set me up] chanced upon in the library.. It questioned my faith and for the first time, giving me doubts about the beliefs of my own church.. The book strengthened me spiritually and i gained much knowledge from it, whether does it applies to daily life, the struggle to maintain a good relationship with my parents but also biblical studies that teaches lessons that could be learnt from few Kings, namely King David and King Solomon.. What stunted me was one of the chapter speaking right into my heart, something that had been bothering me for so long, is about to be released from me, that i may become a much better person. Thank God!

Found it very much comfortable talking to Wei yuan about leading the Christian Lifestyle, how he managed to walk in faith although there are road blocks and tripping stones around in his path..

One last thing: people that you think you are close to might not be the ones who would stand by you in time of needs. But God does! [ but that's another story]. What i mean is where are the people when you need help? Why is it that people come and share your glory and fruits of labour when you clearly know that they din put in as much as you do.. or not even placing a finger on it? Can it be justified? Teach me.. should i continue complaining? Definitely not, and surely, i would not give face or keep silence if that happens again.

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!